It must be my lucky day! I have been informed that I have won a prize in a Canadian lottery, that I cannot even remember entering. I am supposed to keep it secret, so please do not tell anyone. I might not even bother claiming it because the next email advised me that the only remaining relative of a recently deceased Nigerian oil squillionaire would like to deposit trucks full of money in to my UK Bank account. A mutual friend gave him my name in confidence, so I must stand him a drink if I can work out who it was.
I am not quite sure which bank account to use because it seems I have accounts at Lloyds TSB and NatWest that I must have forgotten about. I only know about them because they kindly emailed me to advise that they are updating their security, so all I need to do is confirm my details then I know my money will be safe. This will be quite important in view of my recent good fortune.
I probably now give back word on yesterday’s job offer. Although earning up to £2,000 a week for simply collecting money in the UK from clients and sending it on by Western Union seems like “money fer owld rope”, who needs work when I am going to be in next year’s Times “rich list”.
I do hope that the Tracy, the cute 18 year old co-ed who spotted my “profile” on the net and has got the “hots” for me has not heard about my good fortune, I would like to believe that it’s my 50 something slightly “worn” good looks that caught her eye!
Anyway it’s off to e-bay for me I need a Ferrari or two and maybe a private Island in the Caribbean, to go with my new status.
Its great this T’internet.
See you soon at ivegotmoremoneythanyou.com